What's your favorite Netflix review?

Posted by UpcomingCinema on February 24, 2008 at 12:46pm in The Netflix Website

What's your favorite Netflix review? Mine follows.... anyone who has seen Gymkata will understand just how funny it is as the film is far from a timeless classic. Elvis68 quotes a review from further down the page.... a gentleman by the name of Vic Sarjoo who should really get credit but I wanted to note that Elvis fell in love with this review before I did. Vic Sarjoo has several reviews on Amazon that are also pretty funny.

Gymkata

Elivis68 - The Best of the Bad. Plus my favorite review of a movie by Vic Sarjoo: "Extremely reminiscent of cold war sleepers like "Gorky Park" and "Reds", Gymkata is one of the most carefully scripted and brooding commentaries on American foreign policy during the Reagan years. The film is more like a documentary than a work of fiction in its deep attentione to historical accuracies and avoidance of hyperbole. Robert Clouse's directorial adaption of Dan Tyler Moore's Pulitzer-shortlisted novel manages to capture timbre of the times and the voice of the decade in a script of intricate complexity. Kurt Thomas's portrayal of the hero across from Tetchie Agbayani's heroine is one of the most dynamic and surprising chemistries since Bogart and Bergman's 43 years before. However, where "Casablanca" fell far short of documenting the spirit (and fears) of the times on a granular level, Gymkata and its cast is unafraid to take this plunge. In characterizations deeply respectful, and yet photo-accurate, regarding world cultures and global motifs, Gymkata manages spell the poly-sided views of complex conflicts that occurred during the final grey gasps of the Cold War. Amazingly Gymkata manages a foreshadowing the rise of the Neo-Cons some 20 years later in its depictions of the United States use of aggression in strategically important hotspot regions -- and as well -- the film is able to show that the nationalistic concerns of the competing sovreignties (both ally & foe) remain unchanged despite which decade these events play themselves out in. A timeless film, Gymkata should be a core film study in every graduate level political science class."

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Microwaved on February 25, 2008 at 8:52am: Because I'm narcistic, I think all of mine are the best!

Ha just kidding. I've never really found one that I thought was great, but I'll keep my eye out and let you know.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Headcheese on February 25, 2008 at 9:09am: I love this review! Somebody named AH 998509 reviewed Evil Aliens and I just thought this was hysterical! Check it out, it is one of my favorite reviews and it suits that crazy movie which I also reviewed. Incidently he/she gave it 5 stars!

Probably the worst sci fi I have sat through yet. It was painful to watch at times. The gore was over the top, the acting (a term I use lightly) was equal to if not lacking the classic b movie qualities that are also very painful to watch. I almost could not sit through it the 3rd time! What the #&%$! Just rent it & enjoy.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Maubs on February 25, 2008 at 10:12am: My favorite review on NF was the review of The Return of the King, animated version, by Gollum himself. "The music - It hurts us, it hurts us..." is what I can remember of it. I nearly peed my pants, I was laughing so hard. Of course, it's been removed.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by UpcomingCinema on February 25, 2008 at 11:33am: Incidentally.... Vic Sarjoo is actually a respected executive who has written along with his deadpan funny reviews of bad movies a pile of serious reviews about business journals. His Bio is here. link; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by pterosaur on February 25, 2008 at 11:55am: Mike Hawk has some reviews that make me laugh.

Like this one for Shine
"Do you find yourself terribly tired of tremendously talented tards? Skip Shine."

or

Slayer Still Reigning
"Slayer! Slayer! Slayer! Slayer! Slayer! Like Slayer? They're all up in this MFer."; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by UpcomingCinema on February 25, 2008 at 12:29pm: You are right.... some of Mike's reviews really had me rolling. I love avoid work on a Monday : ); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Heather on February 25, 2008 at 2:50pm: While I haven't found a review that I would consider to be a favorite, Doctor Glove has some incredibly funny reviews, especially for Ultraviolet:

"Take two parts Blade, One part Aeon Flux, One part Minority Report. Mix in a blender with equal parts crap. Blend until creamy and market to the masses. Enjoy."

It can't be a good thing though, when the review is more entertaining than the movie..; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by pterosaur on February 25, 2008 at 2:56pm: Yeah, this one is hilarious!

Hated - G.G. Allin & the Murder Junkies
"Hello friends. Are you looking for that perfect film to rent for the family, or maybe you've got that special someone coming over for an evening in? Then this movie is for you. Follow GG Allin through the trials and tribulations that await him around every corner. No doubt you'll see a little of yourself (and I do mean little!) in this lovable scamp. Kids will enjoy dancing to the catchy songs, and mom and dad can feel great knowing they're giving their children to the best of american culture. All in all, one of the best family movies of 1993. Bon apetite!"

Actually, the Netflix description isn't bad either:

G.G.Allin "made Sid Vicious look like Pat Boone."; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Secret Agent Gal on February 25, 2008 at 3:16pm: There are so many good reviews. Here's one from The Colonel (currently #3 on Netflix). The Colonel shares his perspective and some deep thought in every review. I often find good film ideas in his queue. Although they tend to be long, his reviews are usually worth reading. Here's his view of a documentary:

Shelter Dogs

Well, here's a film that rips your guts out multiple times. As a dog lover and owner one of the worst things that I've ever had to do was to put a dog down. It's a horrible experience... but sometimes a necessary one. And that's what this film is about. In our culture, we've recently made a shift to "no-kill" shelters. What this film points out is that many times 'no-kill' is a euphemism for "torture." And that's because often times these dogs aren't put down and are forced to live in horrid conditions. The doc also points out that many dogs are simply violent and are better dead. That's harsh... but I'm pretty sure it's also true. The film follows the day to day lives of a shelter and the woman who runs it. They are forced to make tough decisions daily and euthanasia is almost constantly looming. How to best handle a terrible situation... that's what this film is really about. And I think it's really well done, really honest and really worth your time. I recommend it to all, but especially to animal lovers and advocates of "no-kill" shelters.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Headcheese on February 25, 2008 at 4:03pm: I read The Colonel's review that you posted here and after I did, I was afraid to rent Shelter Dogs! I'm thinking it might be a little to heart wrenching for me but he certainly got hs point across to me! lol; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Secret Agent Gal on March 2, 2008 at 12:33pm: Just to follow up, I watched Shelter Dogs this weekend. Worth watching - and keep the tissues handy! If you'd like, read my review by clicking Shelter Dogs; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ragweed on February 25, 2008 at 5:09pm: I sometimes forward funny reviews to my friends. Here's a few I've forwarded (I couldn't find them on Netflix, anymore, though--however Ididn't check the one for Gerry).

For Gerry :

This was the best movie I've ever seen, and I'm thrilled that somebody has finally filmed a movie based on my favorite hobby: staring at sand. If you are a fan of sand, I highly recommend this movie. If not, there is still something for everybody....rock and stone lovers, silence buffs, and dialogue haters alike.

For Shall We Dance? by mAGGIE VAZQUEZ:

I'm cuba the movie, hated it tremendously. Again please don't send me anymore movies in Japanesse I'm not Japanesse or Chinese etc...... I speak english and spanish write english amd spanish. I have to return them back now cause the Movie you send me Shall we Dance is in Japanesse.

For Una Noche con Sabrina Love:

Lame. You think this film is a coming of age story and that the teen in the film will learn something from meeting his favorite porn star, but he just gets laid.; ▶ Reply to This